Nothing, Pt. 2.

"Sometimes I have everything, yet I wish I felt something."-Trent Reznor

These past two days have been pretty unique. Elogant some would say, probably.

I took a standardized IQ test yesterday and very, very much to my surprise, I scored a 122% on it, which is slightley above average. I still don't think IQ tests mean shit though. Just because someone has a high IQ doesn't make them any smarter or dumber than the next person, in my opinion. Actually, the way I see it, there's no such thing as a "smart" person because sooner or later ideas and current beliefs are debunked or updated.

Anyway, these past two days have had their fill of abnormal events for sure.

Two of my teachers have "warned" me of getting written up for doodling on a desk and for talking, as if I give or ever gave a damn about their write ups.

I had a nice dream, last night about my brother and my mom and dad who were still married; they were taking me to get a tattoo and it was my twenty first birthday. The thing I have to remind myself constantly, is that it was all just a dream, overall.

I passed my most recent math test with a perfect 100% and the weeks at school are getting shorter by the minute. It feels like January will be here in no time but the question still remains: Will I get out of the place before my original January goal or will I fail at this whole thing again?

Still, I can't shake this feeling of emptiness. I kinda feel numb to both the good and the bad that the past two days have brought me. It's like the walls that I've built against the outside world are working a little bit too good.

The few things that I've come to regret or wish I could do over, still haunt me every single day but the things I stand for and continue to live for are the only things that are keeping me from completley giving up hope on this beautiful-but-flawed world.

I've done lots of things and I've come to aquire a lot through my life, so far, but still....I wish I felt something for it all.