"He used to stay awake to drive the dreams he had away. He wanted to believe in the hands of love." - Bono
"Life is for living, and I don't want to live it alone." - Chris Martin
"Without you, everything falls apart." - Trent Reznor
Some things are beyond me. Things from the likes of George W. Bush getting elected to the presidency twice, to other things such as how blind everyone in general, no matter where I go, seems to be. But the one thing that I'll never truly understand is the extremely strong feelings that I still have for Mia, the one girl I ever truly loved.
It hurts to think of the past that I had with her, but in the present where the two of us have grown up to be the mature people that we are these days, I'm only left with the option to ponder of all that could've been between us. It's weird. Almost as if my only option is to walk in between two infinite walls for the fun of it.
It still kills me inside very much, to the point where nobody can understand, when I think of how much I've always loved that girl. A good way to think of my love for her, is like a really deep pool - that leads into a river - that leads out into the ocean. The feelings that I have for her just get even bigger, and deeper the more I dig.
Have I moved on?
For the most part, yes, seeing as how I dated for the first time in two years since the Mia situation, with Jenna not too long ago. But on the other hand, I'm still the same guy I was two years ago who's best part of his days was being with his first and greatest love.
To be honest, I've never actually felt as close to anyone as I did with Mia. She was, and in some ways, still is, the only person I could ever condfide in with my most deep and dark secrets. She's the only girl who I ever felt an actual connection to, when I really think about it, and that's the exact same reason why I'll always love her.
She used to joke that she was like the Jean Grey to my Scott Summers, but when I think about it, she was right on the money when she forged that connection between us and them because they're the couple that were, and at the same time, weren't meant to be.
It's like a double-edged sword, I guess. When I was with her, she broke my heart so bad that I'm still picking up the pieces two (almost three) whole years later, and when I'm not with her, she's one of the few things that I think about on the daily basis.
I know that I'll never ever be with her, but somewhere within my own heart, I guess I feel nostalgic to the facts of what the two of us once were together. My immense love for her is one of those things that's out of my control and will probably never die.
I once even told her that it feels to me as if I loved her even before I met her, and it may sound cheesy, but I still do feel that way in more ways than one. Even as she's moved on from me, my dreams of her have remained constant in my nights since the first day that I met her.
But for her own sake and out of my love and respect for her, I've learned to keep my distance from her and the guy she's fallen in love with, while I stare down the barrel of eternity alone....
"Life is for living, and I don't want to live it alone." - Chris Martin
"Without you, everything falls apart." - Trent Reznor
Some things are beyond me. Things from the likes of George W. Bush getting elected to the presidency twice, to other things such as how blind everyone in general, no matter where I go, seems to be. But the one thing that I'll never truly understand is the extremely strong feelings that I still have for Mia, the one girl I ever truly loved.
It hurts to think of the past that I had with her, but in the present where the two of us have grown up to be the mature people that we are these days, I'm only left with the option to ponder of all that could've been between us. It's weird. Almost as if my only option is to walk in between two infinite walls for the fun of it.
It still kills me inside very much, to the point where nobody can understand, when I think of how much I've always loved that girl. A good way to think of my love for her, is like a really deep pool - that leads into a river - that leads out into the ocean. The feelings that I have for her just get even bigger, and deeper the more I dig.
Have I moved on?
For the most part, yes, seeing as how I dated for the first time in two years since the Mia situation, with Jenna not too long ago. But on the other hand, I'm still the same guy I was two years ago who's best part of his days was being with his first and greatest love.
To be honest, I've never actually felt as close to anyone as I did with Mia. She was, and in some ways, still is, the only person I could ever condfide in with my most deep and dark secrets. She's the only girl who I ever felt an actual connection to, when I really think about it, and that's the exact same reason why I'll always love her.
She used to joke that she was like the Jean Grey to my Scott Summers, but when I think about it, she was right on the money when she forged that connection between us and them because they're the couple that were, and at the same time, weren't meant to be.
It's like a double-edged sword, I guess. When I was with her, she broke my heart so bad that I'm still picking up the pieces two (almost three) whole years later, and when I'm not with her, she's one of the few things that I think about on the daily basis.
I know that I'll never ever be with her, but somewhere within my own heart, I guess I feel nostalgic to the facts of what the two of us once were together. My immense love for her is one of those things that's out of my control and will probably never die.
I once even told her that it feels to me as if I loved her even before I met her, and it may sound cheesy, but I still do feel that way in more ways than one. Even as she's moved on from me, my dreams of her have remained constant in my nights since the first day that I met her.
But for her own sake and out of my love and respect for her, I've learned to keep my distance from her and the guy she's fallen in love with, while I stare down the barrel of eternity alone....
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